The J when GREEN

The year is 2010 the day Sunday and the date 3^rd Jan I walk into the parlor. I’d treat myself to a relaxing day at the spa that was my intention.

The objective was before me but what should I do about the slight heaviness that lay cradled in my chest. Close to the heart was it? Or was it in touch with the part of me that still tended to hold a gulp of air. Was the feeling in my lungs?

My eyes shut my thoughts hover. What is this feeling holding me hostage? Though visiting less frequently these days it was not dead. Which circumstances or persons were triggers? I gently called the feeling.

It sat before me head bent resting on my knees. Cradled in its arms was my head. Alone! I do not look up. Why? What is it that I am missing? What is this feeling?

Jealousy!

Incredible, but true I am envious of those who take my place giving emotional support to my loved ones. I so desire that I’d be the one to be relied and turned too in times of joy and sorrow. It’s a painful moment as I look at my feelings face to face.

When one does not see love and pain in my separation I take exception to that. Desirous am I to be understood by near and dear ones in these times. Here I choose to stop the roller coaster of self-pity and get off. The sensation subsides and balanced emotion visits. I welcome it!

I like the slow approach in my thinking and a feeling of superior contentment clears my being. How spot on it was going to turn out to be I could see for real as a wave of peace sweeps over me.

Simplicity in my feelings I found when I remembered what it was I really want. Protective I will be of my kin today and always.

It is never too late to begin to face what makes you holds your breath. I began. I am 54 years of age.

Love always

Joscelyn

Getting To Know

The days between asking and receiving are where I live in party with myself and my beliefs.
It’s here that I work to maintain positive balance one day at a time.

On splendid days the spirit is light and anticipation which makes life bright takes over. Breathing is not shallow and neither is thinking or feeling.

Everything seems lifted and fitted on a level so high.

I know here I am living the fruits of my evolving.

My effort to do better, to live and learn has presented its rewards.

I am grateful, and I say a thank you in pray.

I celebrate and enjoy this feeling. I grin at myself in the mirror.

Happiness in sharing comes easy.

Giving is joy itself.

On days where I start sluggish one sure shot to pull myself out of unprogressive ways of thinking is to start writing.

As the words flow I feel calm descend from the crown of my head.

Slowly moving as smoothly as honey finding home on which it is poured.

I am in conversation with myself, my true self.

I must be honest for calm to make home here.

I am appreciative, and I remind myself to say a thank you in pray.

I am glad and benefit from this feeling. I make it a point to smile at myself in my thoughts. In my contentment sharing becomes down-to-earth.

Giving is satisfaction.

On days where I just cannot shake a nagging feeling. I sit down and in the surrounding silence I ask myself, “What are you feeling?”

Honestly answered, this knowing the feeling brings me to the gates of why I am feeling so.

I name the feeling and it is no more a monster

Knowing is progress!

I am positive, and after a while I remember to say a thank you in pray.

I am relieved and benefit from this feeling. I collect myself in my thoughts.

In my ease sharing is ordinary.

Giving is modest.

To experience a consistent

feeling of contentment

that comes from knowing that you are doing your best and

feelings of gratitude

no matter the circumstances,

no matter the kind of day

is the wealth I never want to be without.


Joscelyn

How are you doing?

I'm waiting and while I wait...............

I trust, I thank, I pray, I love, I laugh, I have fun, I believe and have faith.
Some say I am living in Hope.

I read, I write, I cook, I clean, I surf, I create, I garden, I listen to music, I dance.
Some say I am living in the Now.

I walk, I call, I visit, I have visitors, I exercise, I help, I watch movies, I drive.
Some say I am living in Luxury.

I encourage & I motivate,
I learn new things & I improve skills,
I say, I am doing the best I can.

Whats' up with you, these days?

Joscelyn

My Safe Place

Where I laugh.

Where I trust my own abilities.

Where I act on my intuition.

Where I am constructively decisive.

Where I lead by example.

Where I evolve and take others along with me.

Where I use the opportunity to create and renew, both temporal and spiritual.

Where I give without limitations.

Where I move without intimidation.

Where I meet no stagnation.

Where self expression is welcomed.

Joscelyn.

My Attitudes ... CLICK ON IMAGE TO VIEW