When it is time, it will be time enough.

Entertaining NO THOUGHTS of distress and worry

leaves one with a lot of undiluted energy and time.

It’s extraordinary to think many have lived lives such

as this quite naturally.

But for me, I have painstakingly tried and practiced

over years. With a heaping of small and big victories I

now have accomplished it in the 54th year of my life.

I should say here every experience has contributed to

my being. I acknowledge my good and sensible choices

and my imprudent and resentful ones too. I take full

responsibility for my thoughts, words and actions.

I may not agree but I appreciate those who disagree

with me. This is the toughest and the most liberating

clause I have worked to my peace of mind.

I chanced upon something I had written 14 years ago. I

was pleasantly surprised to see that how I am now is

exactly how I wanted to and planned to be that many

years ago. I never looked at myself as such a

passionate, meticulous and focused planner.

But I am.

I never admired myself for my persistence. Over the

years and decades ago I was told by many a coworker

and management of my focus and confidence to get the

task done with finesse.

But I saw it only as confidence of doing my best, just as

doing the needful and going the extra mile for myself

alone.

At the on start itself I could see the end result the way I

wanted it to be.

Once that grip was in place the routes to accomplishing

it were taken on a need basis and never compromised

on, in terms of quality and time investment.

My satisfaction at the end was the reward I sought. I’d

smile to myself in the dark as I lay my head on the

pillow. Well done! I told myself, enthused and raring

to go on to the next day and the next project.

I see myself now as successful at being ME. My heart

agrees. A floating feeling of peace surrounds as I write

this.

I forgive myself for all the trouble wittingly and

unwittingly I caused myself. As I write this my heart

flutters. That’s how alive my conscience is today.

Maybe I have yet to make peace with some things. But

I am on the path I will get there. At last I respect and

love myself as my God intended.

I am reunited with my inner self. I do things, the

things which need to be done for myself. An

expectation in perspective is a gift of fortitude.

Every human has borne pain.

The question is how does pain motivate you? Is it, to

tears, anger, revenge and then uneasy justification in

that order?

Yes, it does we are human after all.

Then after we make the choice of the course of action

the hard work starts. It’s a journey and the reward is

in this alone. I try consistently to walk this talk, I find

it worthwhile.

Try it!

Love always,

Joscelyn